The Big Bad Bully

Remember the Disney movies we grew up with as kids or, for parents, watched and re-watched again and again with your child? Movies like Mean Girls, Max Keeble’s Big Move, and Heavy Weights tugged at our hearts and made us cheer for the underdog. Each had a central theme; bullying is wrong and bullies won’t prevail. In each of these movies there is a ‘big bad bully’ (a vicious leader of the ‘in crowd’, a mean principal, or a crazy camp counselor) that must be overthrown with quirky antics, good spirits, and friendship. In these movies, each bully is given their just desserts and the bullied are freed from tyranny and live happily ever after. However unlike in the movies, many times this hopeful outcome is not attained in reality. This is especially prevalent in the case of cyberbullying. The pervasive trend of cyberbullying through social media changes and intensifies the bully victim relationship, increasing the incidence of teenage depression and suicide.

According to the National Parent/ Teacher Organization, one in every three children will become a bully’s victim via cyber space ("Current Events" 4-5). Some don’t have the opportunity, gumption, or support to fight back. Instead of alerting someone and getting help, ninety percent of children suffer in silence and don’t tell their parents or an official about the abuse they endure (Juvonen 9-18). Not long ago, bullying only took place at school on the playground or maybe at the mall if you were really unlucky. Now kids are harassed and bullied everywhere, even in what is supposed to be their safe place, their home. A shove, a kick, a punch...these were the tools of ‘traditional bullies’. Bullying has changed due to advances in technology, transforming into a new ‘sport’---cyberbullying. Cyberbullying can be defined as “Irresponsible and destructive behavior toward others using technology” (Sabella 1). Victims are harassed through many types of media such as but not limited to email, texts, instant messages, bashing sites, and blogs (Draic). Cyber aggressions not only include the bullying techniques that can be done face-to-face such as talking about another person, but also hostilities like shutting down their email account and post embarrassing photos or videos of them (Calvete, Orue, Estevez, Villardon, and Padilla 1128-1135).

Depression

Because of our prevalent use of various form of technology, bullies have the opportunity to pester their victims mercilessly twenty four hours a day. Victims may find it difficult to secure relief from the harassment caused by cyberbullying (Dooley, Pyzalski, and Cross 182-88). This can cause the sufferer to shut down and shut him or herself off from those closest to him or her. Eventually, this behavior can cause a deep, dark depression. Depression can lead to other stress related conditions such as anxiety, fear, and paranoia.

“…then [I would] run to the toilets and cry” (Sloan). These are the words of then thirteen year old Georgia Woods. She had a fight with a friend which resulted in nasty and rude messages and groups on the social networking site Bebo. “…I even put my school tie around the toilet door to try to hang myself, but couldn’t go through with it…” Georgia faced severe depression as a result of the cyberbullying. Although she didn’t share her feelings with her parents, they discovered her issues by looking through some art Georgia created to express her feelings. Her parent we able to get her help and counseling before her depression escalated.

Suicide

Constant bashing and humiliating messages can cause extreme emotional distress to anyone, but especially to teenagers that are still determining themselves as a people. When teens receive endless messages from multiple tormentors defaming their character, they may feel as though everyone is against them, as if they don’t have anyone to turn to. Victims of the cyber abuse may feel as though there is no help or escape. Suicide becomes their only relief.

For example, Megan Meier, a 13 year old teenage girl living with attention deficit disorder and battling depression, hanged herself in her bedroom closet. The cause? Like many people, she had MySpace account. Sometime after befriending Josh Evans, a person she believed to be a teenage boy, Megan began receiving derogative messages from Josh and others began posting cruel bulletins about her. The last message she received before ending her life was from Josh. “Everybody in O’Fallon knows how you are. You are a bad person and everybody hates you. Have a shitty rest of your life. The world would be a better place without you” (Pokin). This account of cyberbullying shows that words can cause the same if not a worse effect than a traditional bullying.

Resolution

The Megan Meier tragedy of 2006 sparked demands for legislation discouraging cyberbullying. Currently, Congress is debating the Megan Meier Cyberbullying Prevention Act. This bill would prohibit “interstate or foreign commerce any communication, with the intent to coerce, intimidate, harass, or cause substantial emotional distress to a person, using electronic means to support severe, repeated, and hostile behavior” (Rep. Sanchez Introduces Megan Meier Cyberbullying Prevention Act). Basically, this bill forbids the harassment of others through electronic means. With a punishment of two years of prison, fines, or both, this bill –if passed –may find difficulties with enforcement. Many of the possible offenders of this future bill would be today’s youth, some as young as eight years old. If an eight year old child threatened someone’s life online, should we send him or her to prison? No, because the average eight year can’t kill someone. However, if a teenager threatened to kill another person, then sure send him to jail. Essentially, what I’m saying is that if passed, this bill should include discriminative guidelines for punishment based upon age.

Of course, we must realize that cyberbullying cannot be eradicated, but we must try. My mom has always told me education was the key. So I believe this is true here. To help solve this problem, we can educate our youth about the impact a few typed words can have on a person’s essence. We can show them how immoral tearing down another person is and help them make wise decisions while online. As Attorney General Goddard suggests, we should urge the youth to “take the Megan Pledge and take a stand against cyberbullying” (US Fed News Service, Including US State News).

But I’m Being Cyberbullied!

So what should you do if you are cyberbullied? There are many steps you can take to stop the abuse.

1. First, you should alert someone—a parent, a friend, or an official. Let anyone know that you are being bullied.

2. Keep a record of all the abusive communication.

3. Don’t respond. Many times bullies are looking for a response. If you don’t respond, they will move on and leave you alone.

4. Block your attackers. Remove those abusing you from your pages.

5. If the abuse becomes more than you can handle, notify the authorities. Often times, they can trace were the attack is coming from and stop them (Sabella 1-8).

Works Cited

“Attorney General Goddard Encourages Kids to Take Megan Pledge to Stop Cyberbullying.” US Fed News Service, Including US State News, (2008): n/a.

Calvete, Esther, Izaskun Orue, Ana Estevez, Lourdes Villardon, and Patricia Padilla. "Cyberbullying in Adolescents: Modalities and Aggressors' Profile." Computers in Human Behavior 26.5 (2010): 1128-1135. Web. 28 Jul 2010.

"Cyberbullying Teens Say It's Time to Stop the Hate."Current Events 28 Sep. 2008: 4-5. Web. 28 Jul 2010.

Dooley, Julian, Jacek Pyzalski, and Donna Cross. "Cyberbullying Versus face-to-face bullying: A theoretical and conceptual review." Journal of Psychology 217.4 (2009): 182-88. Web. 28 Jul 2010.

Dracic, Sabaha. “Bullying and Peer Victimization.” Materia Socio Medica, 21.4 (2009): 216-219

Juvonen, J. "Extending the School Grounds?--Bullying Experiences in Cyberspace." Journal of School Health 78.9 (2008): 9-18. Web. 28 Jul 2010.

"Rep. Sanchez Introduces Megan Meier Cyberbullying Prevention Act. " US Fed News Service, Including US State News 14 Apr. 2009,Research Library, ProQuest. Web. 26 Jul. 2010

Sabella, Russell. "Cyberbullying:Who, What, Where, Why, and What Now?." Counseling and Human Development 41.8 (2009): 1-14. Web. 26 Jul 2010.

Sloan, Jenna and Lowe, David, “Victims of Cyber Bullying Talk.” Live it Real Life Women. The Sun. 13 Jul 2009. 29 July 2010

Pokin, Steve. "POKIN AROUND: A real person, a real death." St. Charles Journal (2007): n. pag. Web. 28 Jul 2010.